What even is mass effect

startrekrenegades:

Here I’ll break it down for you. 

Mass Effect:

• Humans learn how to spacecraft and space war. 
• Human council goes, “Commander Shepard, we need you to check out some archaeology shit, maybe it’ll make all the aliens like us.”
• Shit falls apart. 
• Commander Shepard goes, “Listen, Super Alien Robots are  coming to kill us all?” 
• Everyone laughs and pats them on the head and says “Yyyeah okay lil human go play”
• Super Alien Robots come.
• “SAVE US COMMANDER SHEPARD”
• “Fine you pieces of shit but I fuckin told you so”
• Make friends with aliens. 
• Save the day.

Mass Effect 2:

• “Alien bugs killed me, but I’m alive.”
• “Also, alien bugs are going to try to kill all humans?”
• Aliens laugh at Shepard. ‘Remember that time you said Super Alien Robots were going to kill us all? Well, we are still alive. Stop bothering the grownups and go play.”
• “YOU ARE ALIVE BECAUSE I FUCKING SAVED YOUR ASSES”
• Go find all your alien friends.
• Smooch your alien friends (very important).
• Save the day.

Mass Effect 3:

• “HEY SO REMEMBER THOSE SUPER ALIEN ROBOTS? STILL A THING.”
• “Shit, boy, you are in trouble, Commander Shepard. We TOLD you not to save our asses, and here we are, alive and ready to puni–”
• Super Alien Robots happen.
• “HELP COMMANDER SHEPARD SAVE US FROM THE SUPER ALIEN ROBOTS”
• Commander Shepard looks into the camera like The Office
• Go find all your alien friends again.
• Smooch your alien lover.
• Also did I mention your ship is a robot and also she’s alive and dating the pilot?
• Kill the Super Alien Robots, probably, or do something else, w/e.
• Your life is ruined.
• Cry for two days. 
• Start a new playthrough.

I’m Commander Shepard, and this is my favorite alien dating sim on the Citadel.